It definitely helps to know that we have a greater future ahead of us than behind.
Having watched my grandparents downsize for years before their deaths really shaped the way I view stuff. They were very responsible about it and it was an act of love for them to downsize before my parents got it all dumped on them. My in-laws, on the other hand, have literally said, "why downsize? We know you'll just take care of it after we die," which actually says a lot about the kind of people they are.
Thrift Stores also help me keep things in perspective- all too much fancy china and dust-collecting curios end up there, and suddenly start looking like so much, well...junk.
Now books, especially old, irreplaceable books, well that would definitely have me stymied!
Books are definitely my greatest love 😆. Thankfully I have kids who also love books. I’m thankful for my parents’ example of downsizing. They understand the weight things can put on the next generation. Your right, it does say something about persons. It’s a tricky navigation!
You are *way* ahead of the game by even thinking of this now. We didn't give it a thought until we were empty nesters looking to downsize. You've got lots of time (God willing, as you say).
I am also a keeper by nature, until two things happened that changed me.. The first was losing all of my worldly possessions in a fire 15 years ago. I was left with my cat (thank God fire fighters knew that cats hide in unusual places like kitchen cabinets) and the clothes on my back. I was also left with my Bible. For some reason, I found it weeks later in the trunk of my car, even though I never kept it there and remembered reading it before work that day and leaving it on my bedside table like always. As the trauma began wearing off much later I realized I could always get more stuff. The world is full of stuff. It was the irreplaceable things that were hard to reconcile: all my photos albums (pre digital cameras) from world travels, family gatherings, childhood, etc. All of my Christmas decorations (in my world travels I collected Christmas decorations instead of souvenirs). Worst of all, my books, especially my collection of children's books. I was a kindergarten teacher at that time and especially loved good children's books. There were other things, but those irreplaceable things were hardest. To this day I only buy ebooks. Because they can't be destroyed. Yes, I miss my shelves of books, but the heartbreak of losing all my books was as hard as losing a beloved family member. I do check books out of the library for book club, but I don't buy actual books anymore.
The second thing was having to clean out my parents' house when they downsized from a four bedroom house plus a garage and my dad's wood shop to a very small one bedroom independent living apartment. My dad was a pack rat who had a very hard time giving up anything, depression era baby that he was. We had to be stealth about it. He had growing dementia so we could get rid of stuff as long as he didn't see us do it. The thing is, all of us six kids now have our own families and stuff and didn't really want or need their stuff. Nobody is going to want most of our stuff either. That's just how it is now in this world of abundance we find ourselves living in now. So, I do my best to keep things at a minimum now that I'm in my senior years. I don't want my family to have to deal with much when I leave this world for my heavenly home. I have acquainted myself with a wonderful thing called the Buy Nothing Project. There are chapters all over the country and it operated on Facebook. My neighborhood has a chapter, as do most neighborhoods. When I decide I no longer need something that is still useful, I list it on my chapter's page and people who can use it ask for it. It's amazing! This way I know my stuff is going to good use. It works both ways if I need something, too. Anyway, it makes it easier to part with stuff and to get to know my neighbors. And keeps things out of landfills.
I can relate to a lot of this, Pam, though I haven’t gone through the trauma of a fire—I know the loss of books and photos would be the worst part for me, too, on something like that! That’s an amazing story about your Bible (and hooray for your cat!). And I’m thankful my parents did a ton of downsizing when they could make decisions about things and ask us—I still remember trying to sort through my grandmother’s things with my mom! I’m really thankful for places who can make use of things I no longer need. Knowing someone else can use it eases the pain.
I love these descriptions of family treasures - and what they signify! Moving a few times in the last couple of years has made me dread the accumulation of stuff, but it is sweet to hold onto special things like china and books. I try to be good about purging the non-sentimental items to make room for those. 😊 But I’m thankful with you that we don’t have to worry about keeping things forever!
I sympathize! I keep things by my nature and parting with things is a hard process. There are sides to the question. I deeply dislike parting with something that I might need again. I kept childhood toys that my children played with. Now I find myself keeping things that my children don’t really play with anymore, but grandchildren would like! (Talking about you, Thomas the Tank Engine.) We have donated all of the baby stuff that we didn’t use much, but I have kept a large bin of boy and girl clothing. I go through phases where I want to purge and organize. I try to ride those as long as I can because then I will reenter keeping and managing mode. My husband’s family are minimalists. My in-laws will not be leaving much behind. My mom keeps everything. I have been trying to help her sort things a few bins at a time. As I only get to their house once a year or so, the process is slow. As we age the question of stuff and what happens to it after we are gone becomes more weighty, literally. This is part of why I love the movie Up. I want to be like Carl Fredrickson at the end of the movie, but I am not there yet.
Sounds like we are definitely kindred spirits here. Also, I love your mention of Up! Yes—I’m definitely not there yet, but it’s something to aspire to.
It definitely helps to know that we have a greater future ahead of us than behind.
Having watched my grandparents downsize for years before their deaths really shaped the way I view stuff. They were very responsible about it and it was an act of love for them to downsize before my parents got it all dumped on them. My in-laws, on the other hand, have literally said, "why downsize? We know you'll just take care of it after we die," which actually says a lot about the kind of people they are.
Thrift Stores also help me keep things in perspective- all too much fancy china and dust-collecting curios end up there, and suddenly start looking like so much, well...junk.
Now books, especially old, irreplaceable books, well that would definitely have me stymied!
Books are definitely my greatest love 😆. Thankfully I have kids who also love books. I’m thankful for my parents’ example of downsizing. They understand the weight things can put on the next generation. Your right, it does say something about persons. It’s a tricky navigation!
If you imagine burdening your children with all your "stuff" someday, you may find it easier to give it the old heave-ho sooner!
Certain things, for sure! And whatever we do, I don’t want to leave it all for them to sort through. We’ll make decisions before then, Lord willing!
You are *way* ahead of the game by even thinking of this now. We didn't give it a thought until we were empty nesters looking to downsize. You've got lots of time (God willing, as you say).
I am also a keeper by nature, until two things happened that changed me.. The first was losing all of my worldly possessions in a fire 15 years ago. I was left with my cat (thank God fire fighters knew that cats hide in unusual places like kitchen cabinets) and the clothes on my back. I was also left with my Bible. For some reason, I found it weeks later in the trunk of my car, even though I never kept it there and remembered reading it before work that day and leaving it on my bedside table like always. As the trauma began wearing off much later I realized I could always get more stuff. The world is full of stuff. It was the irreplaceable things that were hard to reconcile: all my photos albums (pre digital cameras) from world travels, family gatherings, childhood, etc. All of my Christmas decorations (in my world travels I collected Christmas decorations instead of souvenirs). Worst of all, my books, especially my collection of children's books. I was a kindergarten teacher at that time and especially loved good children's books. There were other things, but those irreplaceable things were hardest. To this day I only buy ebooks. Because they can't be destroyed. Yes, I miss my shelves of books, but the heartbreak of losing all my books was as hard as losing a beloved family member. I do check books out of the library for book club, but I don't buy actual books anymore.
The second thing was having to clean out my parents' house when they downsized from a four bedroom house plus a garage and my dad's wood shop to a very small one bedroom independent living apartment. My dad was a pack rat who had a very hard time giving up anything, depression era baby that he was. We had to be stealth about it. He had growing dementia so we could get rid of stuff as long as he didn't see us do it. The thing is, all of us six kids now have our own families and stuff and didn't really want or need their stuff. Nobody is going to want most of our stuff either. That's just how it is now in this world of abundance we find ourselves living in now. So, I do my best to keep things at a minimum now that I'm in my senior years. I don't want my family to have to deal with much when I leave this world for my heavenly home. I have acquainted myself with a wonderful thing called the Buy Nothing Project. There are chapters all over the country and it operated on Facebook. My neighborhood has a chapter, as do most neighborhoods. When I decide I no longer need something that is still useful, I list it on my chapter's page and people who can use it ask for it. It's amazing! This way I know my stuff is going to good use. It works both ways if I need something, too. Anyway, it makes it easier to part with stuff and to get to know my neighbors. And keeps things out of landfills.
I can relate to a lot of this, Pam, though I haven’t gone through the trauma of a fire—I know the loss of books and photos would be the worst part for me, too, on something like that! That’s an amazing story about your Bible (and hooray for your cat!). And I’m thankful my parents did a ton of downsizing when they could make decisions about things and ask us—I still remember trying to sort through my grandmother’s things with my mom! I’m really thankful for places who can make use of things I no longer need. Knowing someone else can use it eases the pain.
I love these descriptions of family treasures - and what they signify! Moving a few times in the last couple of years has made me dread the accumulation of stuff, but it is sweet to hold onto special things like china and books. I try to be good about purging the non-sentimental items to make room for those. 😊 But I’m thankful with you that we don’t have to worry about keeping things forever!
I sympathize! I keep things by my nature and parting with things is a hard process. There are sides to the question. I deeply dislike parting with something that I might need again. I kept childhood toys that my children played with. Now I find myself keeping things that my children don’t really play with anymore, but grandchildren would like! (Talking about you, Thomas the Tank Engine.) We have donated all of the baby stuff that we didn’t use much, but I have kept a large bin of boy and girl clothing. I go through phases where I want to purge and organize. I try to ride those as long as I can because then I will reenter keeping and managing mode. My husband’s family are minimalists. My in-laws will not be leaving much behind. My mom keeps everything. I have been trying to help her sort things a few bins at a time. As I only get to their house once a year or so, the process is slow. As we age the question of stuff and what happens to it after we are gone becomes more weighty, literally. This is part of why I love the movie Up. I want to be like Carl Fredrickson at the end of the movie, but I am not there yet.
Sounds like we are definitely kindred spirits here. Also, I love your mention of Up! Yes—I’m definitely not there yet, but it’s something to aspire to.